Olympic Limericks

Giles Smith in the Times (£) notes that Tweddle rhymes with medal. As indeed it does.

The middle-aged gymnast Beth Tweddle
Has finally won a bronze medal.
She said, "What a blast!
I've done it at last.
I can now take me foot off the pedal."

The splendid Sir Christopher Hoy
Has been cycling since he was a boy.
Now that he's old,
He always gets gold,
A fact about which he's not coy.

Our long-distance runner Mo Farah,
'E's a bit of a dark cockney sparrah.
'E's asked, "Does it pay?"
"You're jokin'. No way.
I'd be better off pushin' a barrah."

The golden girl Jessica Ennis
Got her medal from running, not tennis.
When asked why this was,
She said, "Well, because..."
And then, enigmatically, "Dennis".

Victoria Pendleton's tears,
Are what the nation most fears.
She was ever so bold,
But was pipped to the gold,
By a muscular Aussie called Meares.

Well, you know....if Danny Boyle can celebrate the opening in a quirky British way, we can also celebrate our winners in a quirky British way...

Comments

[sackcloth and ashes]

A smarmy French fella once said
'In honours we'll end up ahead'.
By the close of the games
And much to his shame
The medal table left his face red.