Dry Sex

I remember reading about this some years ago as a possible factor, largely unacknowledged, in the spread of HIV/AIDS, and now a post at Metafilter provides some links. It seems that African men in certain sub-Saharan cultures place a high value on dry sex. Not only do they believe self-lubrication of the woman's vagina reduces their pleasure, they also find it unclean:

Widely practised in Zimbabwe, Malawi, Zambia and South Africa, dry sex is hardly ever spoken about. It is penetrative sex between a man and a woman, where the woman has previously inserted a substance – methylated spirits, antiseptics, coarse salt, snuff, bicarbonate of soda, vinegar, talcum powder, ice, alum, Zam-Buk, traditional muti (usually prescribed by a traditional healer), soil with baboon urine, shredded newspaper, household detergents or bleach – into her cervix in order to make her vagina dry. Some women insert drying herbs in a cloth or stocking, which they keep inside during foreplay and remove just before penetration to 'make the thing behave, as one woman put it. They do this so when their lovers enter them, they are 'dry and clean,’ because both men and women see their wetness as a sign of promiscuity and dirt.

Soil with baboon urine? Yep, it's known as mutendo wegudo:

Sipewe Mhakeni used herbs from the Mugugudhu tree. After grinding the stem and leaf, she would mix just a pinch of the sand-colored powder with water, wrap it in a bit of nylon stocking, and insert it into her vagina for 10 to 15 minutes. The herbs swell the soft tissues of the vagina, make it hot, and dry it out. That made sex "very painful," says Mhakeni. But, she adds, "Our African husbands enjoy sex with a dry vagina."

Many women concur that dry sex, as this practice is called, hurts. Yet it is common throughout southern Africa, where the AIDS epidemic is worse than anywhere in the world. Researchers conducting a study in Zimbabwe, where Mhakeni lives, had trouble finding a control group of women who did not engage in some form of the practice. Some women dry out their vaginas with mutendo wegudo -- soil with baboon urine -- that they obtain from traditional healers, while others use detergents, salt, cotton, or shredded newspaper. Research shows that dry sex causes vaginal lacerations and suppresses the vagina's natural bacteria, both of which increase the likelihood of HIV infection. And some AIDS workers believe the extra friction makes condoms tear more easily.

Dry sex is not the only way African women subordinate their sexual safety to men's pleasure. In a few cultures, a woman's vagina is kept tight by sewing it almost shut. But in most African societies, the methods are subtler: Girls are socialized to yield sexual decision-making to men. Prisca Mhlolo is in charge of counseling at The Centre, a large organization for HIV-positive Zimbabweans. "You're not even allowed to say, 'Can we have sex?' " she notes. "So it's very hard to bring up condoms."

Mhlolo speaks from both professional and personal experience. She is HIV-positive, infected by her late husband. As AIDS eroded his immune system, he suffered from herpes, which broke into open sores on his penis. Mhlolo suggested condoms, "but he said, 'Now that I'm sick you have gotten yourself a boyfriend.' It was very hard."

Many people balk at discussing the sexual practices of particular cultures because the issue is too sensitive -- and, in Africa, too racially charged. Whites have caricatured African sexuality for centuries, casting black men as sexual beasts, and some whites still whisper that this is why HIV is running rampant among Africans. But such stereotypes miss the point, which is not the libido itself but the culture in which it finds expression. [...]

Of course, Africa contains thousands of cultures, some of which have strict sexual codes. But common to many sub-Saharan societies are the gender roles epitomized by dry sex: Women are unable to negotiate sex, and so must risk infection to please the man. In fact, there are very few female checks and balances on male behavior. This stark inequality "is part of our culture," Mhlolo says, "and our culture is part of why HIV is spreading."

This conclusion seems about right:

What South Africa and southern Africa need to save us from AIDS is nothing less than a cultural revolution. Mbeki was right about one thing: AIDS is a disease of poverty, but mainly because at this level the stark discrepancy between the power of men and women puts women at such extraordinary risk. Of course we need to deal with the appalling economic and health situation in our country, but we also have to deal with a culture that empowers its men so much more than its women when it comes to sex. In Africa, AIDS is a gender issue, and until we address it as such, we an never win the war.

Comments

[uwe]

a tight & dry vagina gives very good friction to my penis .thats why i prefer it in that way...

[Mick H]

Well thanks for sharing that with us, Uwe.

[sue]

I just thinks it's selfish and cruel and only condonned by men that has no respect for women at all. I think it is as oppresive as rape, it has to do with power, why else would any man want his partner to be in pain during sex? This has nothing to do with kinky sex either because there is no pleasure in it for the woman, and has nothing to do with mutual consent because in the absence of some form of pleasure or gratification no person would consent to being hurt.

[sarah]

it is definetly cruel and barbaric!

[Roni]

I thought I understood tradition, and after reading about these topics I guess I just don't. Is it all an issue of mis-education? dry sex is unpleasurable for both, also much more dangerous for the woman, SO WHY DO IT>? IT IS NOT CLEAN! Women's vaginas lubricate because they are supposed to not because they are dirty! our body acts only for neccisary reasons! There is so much to be said about this... Its really inferiorating.

[Roni]

"a tight & dry vagina gives very good friction to my penis" who are you>? I hope you are joking, and it isn't something to even joke about

[Mai Chibwe]

The number of times I have heard women asking what they should put up their vaginas to keep them dry is too many to count. I really have no idea why anyone would be married to a man who knowingly encourages his wife to damage herself in this way. There again its the samme type of man who is happy to go out and have sex with others then bring HIV home and happily give it to his wife.

The only time a woman should put anything up her that is not her husband's penis is when she has an infection, or if she uses tampons. Otherwise nothing should go up there at all. There is no reaso. if she is worried that she is not gripping her husband enough during sex, then she should take steps to tone her vaginal muscles. If she goes to town about it, she can be so tight as to be able to grip him so hard he cannot pull it out once in regardless of how small he is.

A woman should, in my view tone continually through her life. It also helps to reduce incontinence and it increases pleasure for her during sex. Once she is well toned, there is never a need to have sex before she is really wet, and she can control her husband's speed thus prolonging sex.

A man who finds his wife using chemicals as a substitute for toning should sit her down and tell her he does not approve. it is not nice for her and should frighten him to think that is what he has caused his wife to do.

people should not still be discussing such a topic in 2007.

[Rick]

This story is garbage, as are most of these stories about ridiculous African sexual practices. These are the kind of stories that prop up the racist myth of HIV originating in Africa. Dry sex defies common sense, which I guess is the idea...to perpetuate the notion that Africans lack common sense and thus are the authors of their own destruction.

[K, London]

Sorry Rick, but you are wrong. My ex-girlfriend is a sexual health nurse in London, England. She often sees African women whose husbands convince them to put sand and similar substances in their vaginas in order to dry them out.

Personally, I love a wet pussy.

[Pat Ramb]

this story is such crap. Something must promote HIV in any culture. Here it might b dry sex, in America its homos, or needles. Yet i do not believe dry sex promotes AIDS. The writers of these articles write as if their views are unbiased, but at the center its racism. They act as if the woman is not paticipating in this scenario. In fact women of that culture make private jokes among themselves of hwo much they fool their husbands in the process. They compete about who has the best technique. They often are much versed in the muscular technique of the west without their husabnd knowing. So Africans have their kinks as the West does. Is Africa writing about the life trhreathening kinky practices of America, London, etc? No. Your article is an abuse of power and an exxageration of a practice that does not force the woman into it at all. She simply does it to keep her man, and doesnt have to at all.

[Mickey]

this story is hogwash, a perfect trash, black people have lost their culture all they do is to concur with white people nonsense about who we are. baboon urine is actually used as a stimulant for man. how can one penetrate a dry woman? i find this hard to believe, why are whites fascinated about black genitalia? especially the black dick.

[Inini]

"Researchers conducting a study in Zimbabwe, where Mhakeni lives, had trouble finding a control group of women who did not engage in some form of the practice."- my foot, ignorant ill informed fool, what do u take Zimbabwean, atribe of people living in the stone age or what!!!!!Whats your agenda. I am a 100% Zimbabwean woman who does not do any of the things in this article, those whom u say do is their own choice although i have NEVER heard of anyone who does that crap . If u speak to 3 or 4 women , to u its the of Zimbabwe, nonsense!!!

[mandy gambi]

dont spoil the dignity of an african woman!!! how the hell does one even collect a baboons urine and actually live to tell he tale?